I wanna let my clothes rot off my body
Because simply stripping would be too civilized
I want the fabric to thin until it disintegrates
To become part of the air at the touch of my finger
I wanna pull my hair
Until its six feet long
Trip over it as I enter the forest
Run my hands through it
Until dandruff pours out like blizzards
Turning the surrounding shrubs into snow-peaked hills
I wanna run
Because if I weren’t running
Then I wouldn’t be running
Run with the branches and bushes and wild animals in my path
But not in my way
Until gravity finally dominates my muscles
And I’m crawling and pulling
I wanna bleed
Feel the pain coursing through my body
Arouse the savage beast inside the savage beast
Claw at myself
Until I’m awake
Bleed for the sake of bleeding
Feel my body break down
Use the blood for war paint
In my fight against the civilized world inside of me
I wanna hunt
Look the grizzly in the eye with mutual respect
Enter the predators’ game
No rules, no hiding, just kill
I wanna wrestle hand to claw
With every muscle in my body
And experience the thrill of the kill
Every night I wanna howl at the moon
Because it’s there
Because it’s God as much as it’s not
Every night I’ll howl
From whimper to a crescendo
Until I’m yawping-screaming
Refraining from breathing
Until I’m on the ground
I wanna make love to the dirt
Because no lower form exists
Become one with the dirt
Pull myself closer
Bury myself deeper
Until I’m eating the dirt, breathing the dirt
I wanna forget language
Leave behind all aspects of knowledge and reason
Even if I need to head-bang English out of my system like a burning book
And commence with a new form of communication
Grunts and squeals
Chirps and groans
Barks and roars
Until there’s nothing left of the civilized me
And I’ve cultivated the natural
I wanna celebrate by letting out one final
Aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrooo
